Thursday, October 25, 2007

Spalding Gray is Not Missing

No matter if you like or dislike, agree or disagree with Spalding Gray remarks in his monologue about the Cambodian killing fields, you probably will remember Swimming to Cambodia. Gray's is a one man show with a one sided narrative. Gray's remarks are liberal enough to irk the patriotic but tempered with enough humor and crass reality to give serious pause to any thinking person.

Based on his small acting role in the film The Killing Fields, Gray delivers his historical, political and social interpretation of American and Southeast Asian events of the 1970s. Gray cautions in a semi-serious way, that he is mostly telling the truth. The viewer is left to make up their own mind while Gray proceeds with a mish mash of stories about sex, drugs and religion. Interspersing stories of his own obsessive compulsions and quest for the perfect moment with accounts of a brain washed, drunken sailor and mimicries of haughty actors, Gray surprises, amuses and sometimes distresses his audience. The outcome is a long story about the naivety and evil of individual and collective human nature although that may be somewhat removed from his final intent.

Is Gray portraying himself or a fictional self? So much nervous energy abounds; it is easy to be convinced Gray himself needs a "talking cure" or to be part of the movie therapy that he recommends for the inhabitants of a country that has experienced war. An elusive persona in art and in life, Gray was missing for a time after jumping from a New York City bridge. The discovery of his body, closed the mystery of his death. But, his words still remain and cause one to ponder the confused, the weak and the innocent as well as the role and responsibility of the powerful.

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Kid Sounds

A five minute prologue of Chicago Public Radio's How to Talk to Kids sets the stage for the three part October 5th broadcast. To introduce the topic about kids, host Ira Glass interviews fifth graders to find out what they think about how adults speak to them. He asks the kids questions using a short and direct style, keeping the conversation honest and simple. The kids talk about how adults talk down to them; probably Glass has altered his interaction to suit the occasion.

The setting seems to be in a school since the sounds of children talking, people walking and a door slamming shut can be heard in the background. The hollow sound of a big room or a high ceiling is apparent. Kids talk over each other. Sometimes the fading in and out of their voices is natural; sometimes the producers have altered the sounds. But, listening to the kids actual conversations, without later paraphrasing, is refreshing. It keeps it honest. Most say the same thing but in different ways with different inflections. The exception is the use of the the word "like". Similar to "um", it is commonly used by all ages.

Playful music delicately tinkles in the background. Glass speaks of "what is most delicate" when preparing the adult listeners to hear about teens and sex. It is a pleasant preparation.

Tickle, tickle, tickle

I don't know if my five-year old daughter heard someone say tickle, tickle, tickle, Mr. Pickle or if she made up the rhyme. But, she used to say it over and over again and laugh. Chicago Public Radio, This American Life's October 5th broadcast addresses How to Talk to Kids. Kid's humor stays the same; a pickle is funny. But then:

"I don't want a pickle
Just want to ride on my motorsickle
And I don't want a tickle
Cause I'd rather ride on my motorsickle
And I don't want to die
Just want to ride on my motorcy...cle"

Arlo Guthrie knew adults laugh at pickles, too.

Kids just really want honesty. Yesterday, I asked my friend's seven year old granddaughter does she like school. Why did I do that? I know better. My uncle used to annoy me with "How old are you?" when I was a kid. He did that on purpose. And then he would ask about school. I hated it. Two Sundays ago, my pastor's daughter showed me a puppet of Moses that she had just finished making in Bible school. Now, this puppet was made up of a round, paper head pasted onto a popsicle stick. She said, "does this look like a sucker ?" I said, (always trying to be diplomatic while being truthful) "well, it is supposed to be Moses, right? But, it looks like a sucker." She said with obvious relief, "finally, a grown-up that will tell me the truth."

Act number two, talking to teens about sex is a more complicated topic. Of my four kids, I only talked to the first one about sex. It was so uncomfortable, I never did it again. I decided the next three would find out from their friends or siblings, or books, movies and TV, just like I did. (I did wonder was there another meaning to tickle, tickle, tickle, Mr. Pickle and concluded it was just the silliness of a five year old.)

When I was about sixteen, my mom left the book, Fannie Hill unattended in a desk drawer. Fannie spent a few days out of the drawer and then was returned to the exact spot.

Sex education in schools is overrated. When my girls were attending middle school, I spent an afternoon in the guidance office reading the material that was presented in their life class. I learned that the curriculum would bore the least curious child. Looking back on my actions, I did want to know what kind of morality was being imparted to my kids. I realize that a very conservative parent would ask to see the sex ed course. I think I am conservative. Is giving a sexually active teen birth control a wise decision? How about letting minors sleep together in your home? The Age of Consent presents a story told through an anonymous letter from the mother of a teen girl who informed her mother that she had lost her virginity. The mother makes a convincing case for accepting a circumstance that is less than ideal. Is the mother being rational or is she avoiding in the same way that I did when it was too uncomfortable to deal with the topic of sex?

Somehow acceptance seems better than childish tirades. Act number three replays Alec Baldwin's recent recorded blast aimed at his 12 year old daughter. At some point, we grow up and become adults. Children call other people pigs. When adults regress at times and slip back into childish behaviors, it would seem the mature thing to do is to admit the mistake. All parents make mistakes.

Hear Chicago Public Radio, This American Life, October 5, 2007 How to Talk to Kids at http://www.thislife.org/Radio_Episode.aspx?sched=1209